Phil Amanet, died on 19 September 2009 at 55 years of age after a life of prison, rough sleeping, working on the Kursaal fair in Southend and Jesus. Read his life story, read his poems and see his video. We miss him.
Phil was born on 16th June, 1954, in Chelmsford. He was placed at birth into a children’s home, where he stayed until he was adopted just before his third birthday.
Phil found life difficult in his teens and began to be in trouble: stealing and running away; getting drunk. He went to remand schools, hostels and rehabilitation centres. Some significant places and people were the Christian staff and social workers at the rehabilitation projects. One of these places, ‘Beacon Hill Farm’, was a church organisation. It was here that Phil says that he first came across “the love of Jesus”; but he honestly shares his unreadiness to change his lifestyle at this point in his life, and he continued to drift from job to job and place to place, still drinking heavily and stealing.
When Phil was about 18, he came across a travelling preacher from America called Frank Rootzer. Phil says, “the words from him telling us all about Jesus Christ were rubbing off on me and had started me believing.”
Phil also says, “I was going to church but I was still doing evil things like pinching money from other people who were helping and loving me. I had become addicted to thieving money.” Shortly after this, Phil was on remand in Norwich prison, regularly going to court. He was there for many months, but then, in his own words,
“This man from the USA came and helped me out and he loved me as all Christians do. The time came for me to go to the crown court for sentencing, but to my surprise, they gave me a warning that if I was to get into trouble then the court would throw the book at me and throw away the keys. Because of Mr. Rootzer and Jesus I walked out of that court a free man. I was given three years’ probation and I was to stay at this man’s own house!”
Sadly, after two weeks Phil was stealing again, and this time would go to Borstal for a longer time.
At 21 Phil joined a travelling funfair and loved the life and did a variety of jobs. But at 22 he and a new friend had a shoplifting spree. Here Phil first started sleeping rough, in between hostels and visits to court. He went back to the funfair job later, and began running some of the big rides. This job went on for eight years, but it was summer work; during the winters Phil lived in a variety of hostels. He spent one winter in Southend, which was later to become his home. Phil was often in trouble still for drunken behaviour and stealing money. He spent three months in Brixton prison.
At the end of 1979 he decided to leave the life of the funfair. He walked most of the way from Chelmsford to Cambridge and stayed at the Church Army hostel. Phil started stealing again and also damaged some property and was again in trouble. He expected a seven year sentence but was given just a fine! After a few months of sleeping rough near Waterloo Bridge and on park benches he decided to go to try to find work at the Kursaal Southend, which was then a funfair. He worked there for the summer then went back to London during the winter, again sleeping rough. In 1982 Phil decided to stay in Southend permanently.
Between 1982 and 1985, Phil was helped by a church house trust called ‘Ruth House’, and was involved in sports and temporary employment schemes in connection with Westcliff Baptist Church. It was here that, with help, Phil started up his disco. He bought two record players and speakers. He also began work in the gardening trade. He started going to church again. He went to Westcliff Elim church and Bible studies. He also did his first Southend carnival, as ‘Mr. Jack’, covered in Union Jacks. Life was good except for the secret drinking at home, but this too he managed to stop! The next time carnival came around he became a clown for the first time. He enjoyed carnival charity work and in this and in his church he says that he was, “really finding the blessing of the Lord Jesus and his love that never runs dry… now I love him even more, it’s a lesson to me.” He goes on to say,
“My life was really changing with the life of Jesus, who is my Lord… Jesus rules my life and everything that I do I do it for him. When you do good things he is pleased with you, but if you sin he will tell you off. But Jesus forgives all your sins. What a love he has!”
Phil was baptised in 1985.
In 1987, two majorette troupes in Chelmsford chose the name of the clown Phil was to play in all the future carnival and charity work he was to do: ‘Bojo’. This came at the same time as Phil got his first ever home via a scheme in Southend called ‘Southend Centre for the Homeless’.
In Phil’s 25 years of carnivals as Bojo the clown, he raised thousands of pounds for many charities. Phil says, “I met many sad children and by the time I’ve had a chat to them, that child is smiling.” He adds,
“When I was sleeping on park benches or even in shop doorways, or whatever I did in those strange days and years of being a young tramp, Jesus was always there knocking at my door, and I was not in. One day I got off my backside and said to my friend, ‘It’s time to find a better way in life.’ And I did. I came to Southend and found that I had more to offer to others than I knew. God gave me a lot more in life, things to do, things I wouldn’t have dreamed of doing. Like my clowning; I would not have done that if I had not got off my backside from that park bench near Waterloo Bridge. I wish I could have done more when I was younger, but it was not to be. I feel ashamed of what I did before, but Jesus and God forgives us all when we’re in trouble or do something wrong. I do love giving lots of fun to children, especially those who are unhappy or sick; to give them a bit of enjoyment. I meet many thousands of children. Life feels great when you see their faces glow with joy.”
The cell group (25/02/06) (Phil writes about his experiences of the small group in the church)
I was empty in my life
I had nothing but sad days
I could not find a good friend.
Then I asked someone, is there something for me?
“Yes,” he said, “Jesus, a very good friend”!
“Come along,” he said.
Your love grew in me.
You listened to my problems
You prayed for me for healing, hope, and advice.
Most of all you were good loving friends
A new family!
This was what I was looking for.
I love you for that.
You share all things with me.
What a different person I’ve become!
Your gracious love shines in your faces.
Thank you all,
Phil.
The Joy of Life (3/03/06)
The joy of living is knowing you.
This hasn’t always been the case.
When I was younger I was nasty.
When anyone put money on the table, I had it,
I didn’t care who I hurt,
Whoever got in my way.
I was greedy and hurtful.
But when you came into my life
You changed me into someone new.
I was a caring and loving person.
Jesus came in and shook me up.
You showed me a new life
And a new destiny
What a way of living!
You showered me with your patience.
Lord, you are one in me.
Thank you for all you have given little me.
I had nothing (2006)
I who had nothing in life
I who was down and out.
I who could not ask for anything
I who had nothing to look forward to
I who just dreamt of nice things
I who wondered, and thought, but not acted
I who just lived.
I who just waited and watched.
I who was just a clown with a disco.
I who had nobody who really cared.
I who have everything now!
I who has new life, and family and friends.
A new church! A new way of thinking.
A new life, I feel not left out.
All I ever wanted is to feel needed.
Jesus has done this, with you.
Life as it is (2006)
You gave me life
You that gave me breath.
You teach me right from wrong.
You brought me friends and family.
You took loneliness from my heart.
You gave me love instead of hatred.
Your grace gave me peace of mind.
What more could I ever need?
Life is life, joy is joy
Let’s think of someone less well off than us.
The joy of knowing you is peaceful.
I came with sadness and nothing at hand
Now I have more than I need.
In this love joy and peace
Let’s enjoy what we each have left in life with Jesus.
You are always there (10/07/06)
When I awake you are there
When I need help you are there
When I talk you are there
When I walk in the park you are there
When I am sick you are there
When I am angry you are there
When I am in the wrong you are there
When I was down and out you were there
Oh what a joy you are!
You are always there, no matter what,
Jesus.
Church from Scratch (2006)
There I was looking for something new
And this I found in you.
Someone to share a problem or two
Someone to open up to.
What friends, boy do you eat so much!
This I’m not complaining about, but enjoy the fellowship.
At times this seems a different world to what we live in
What a lot of kind and good people you are.
Is this what life is all about?
What more can I say? There is only one word,
Thanks!
Me (2007)
When I’m down you are there
When I’m alone you are there
When I’m ill you comfort me
When I need a friend you are there
When I’m in the wrong you are there
When I am lonely you are there
Jesus, you are always there.
Phil Amanet, died on 19 September 2009 at 55 years of age after a life of prison, rough sleeping, working on the Kursaal fair in Southend and Jesus. Read his life story, read his poems and see his video. We miss him.
